Here goes nothing...or maybe, it's the "something" that will make a real difference in my future romantic partner. In the spirit of which I was asked, I will think about aspects of a man that I haven't consciously thought about in a couple of decades. Men just didn't show up on my radar until the divorce was imminent.
Appearance
Yes, I'm one of those tall, dark, and handsome ninnies! I love the fur, the big schnoze, the swarthy features and throw in a great body and I'm smitten. But, that isn't my reality. I've typically dated the all-American good looking fellow...not extreme in any fashion but nice to look at and comfortable to snuggle. A man doesn't have to be physically gorgeous for me to want him...he just has to love his appearance and be confident...that makes a woman purr.
Personality
Laughter is contagious and I love to laugh. If a gentleman wants to entertain me, he can take me for a walk and give me a running commentary on the hilarity of life. When the occasion demands solemnity, it would be a blessing to share deeper insights with someone who can appreciate the fragility of happiness and who is mature enough to embrace the need for personal growth.
I want to find someone who has control of his temper or is working on overcoming that weakness. Since I boil a little hot, one of us needs to keep a cool head! And I definitely do NOT want to date a man who "knows" everything about everything. It's exhausting to argue point after point and I can easily slip into the peace-maker mode and let the anger build up. Hopefully, I will meet someone who doesn't care how many times he's right...instead, he will gently steer me to his side. Ohhhhhh, I want a diplomat! :-)
Ambition/Career
I hear it a lot..."My career is not the most important thing..." Actually, it's been scientifically proven that for the majority of men, his work does come first. I think ambitious men find it hard to turn that off so I accept that it makes up a major component of their lives. The tricky part...if they can turn it off when they get home or when they're on a date.
I believe that a successful career can create a happy man because being a "provider" is part of their DNA. But I will never settle again for a man who lets it take over his life, thereby ruining his closest relationships.
Priorities
I don't need dating so that I have a man to "take me places," but I do want to be with someone as I enjoy life's treasures. I've had the relationship that gave me "stuff," whether I wanted it or not, and I know that things don't bring happiness. Time and effort are the greatest gifts
My top priority for a man then is his attention. Fortunately for him, it doesn't mean I have to be in his constant physical presence. It just means that he has to "touch base" with me regularly. I ended up hyper sensitive to being ignored and some kind of daily contact will make me melt. Let's hope he can see well enough to text! ha ha Emoticons will be my man's friend...smiley faces for smiley me!
Another top priority, I expect to be introduced to his circle of family and friends and I expect him to want to meet mine. I will not drift into his personal time but I hope our lives merge more than they diverge...otherwise, why even date? I like company and if he doesn't...is there even a purpose to being with someone? Not for me.
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