Conversation Courage

During my journey, I have encountered and dealt with physical and intellectual fears but still I pause with fear of emotional drama.  Part of it stems from my ignorance of what makes me and others behave/react in predictable patterns.

I understand that triggers play an integral role in my fear but I'm unsure of how that process affects my judgment once I acknowledge it.  Seemingly, if I can pinpoint when/what/how of my reaction then it would be logical that I could alter the outcome.

But I don't.  I can't halt a full scale panic of my emotional center once it's activated.  This interests me greatly and I seek as much knowledge as possible in the hopes that I can lessen emotional responses on my part.  Knowledge is power but emotion trumps power with subconscious action.

Yes, I seek to become Spock!  ha ha  A reasonable and logical nature is intriguing as it allows intellect to be the main player in life drama.  I do covet that ability.  Now that I've taken my brain out (as if it were a dusty toy) to play, I don't want to be distracted by my emotions.  And therein lies the problem; humans are physiologically geared to react in an emotional way.  Our hormones, instincts, DNA, and upbringing lock us into patterns that we can't ignore.

We tend to fall into certain categories as we seek calm.  Professionals who MUST be detached emotionally (military, medical staff, security) to do their job do not escape their suppressed emotions.  Instead, coping mechanisms kick in later and refuge is found individually.  And then there are the rest of us who struggle with our daily routines and must deal with emotions as soon as they present.  Fitness, family support, unacceptable social behaviors are examples of what it takes to deal with latent emotions.  Today's society produces mountains of research for the singular purpose of managing our coping mechanisms.

I want more research into how to manage negative emotions at their onset.  When I feel the angst, I want to know how to pull forth my courage and have the conversation...the conversation with myself, others, or a counselor to manage my reaction rather than manage the fall-out of coping mechanisms.