Saved

How can one label a life saving event as anything less than miraculous?  A divorce has saved my life...literally.

Yes, it sounds like such a cliche, the old "things happen for a reason," but following that line of reasoning makes it easier to look at the path I've traveled and make sense of its twists and turns.

When I was married and buried in unhappiness, neck deep with head in sand, I ignored a swirling mass of warning signs.  There was so much more to worry about than my own health or safety.  I concentrated on my children's happiness, on my friends' contentment, on helping build my husband's career by providing the foundation of home and hearth.  I played "arm candy" well but my main position was to provide an oasis of calm for his hectic life.  The beautiful home, the content children, the charming hostess...I did it with pride and also enjoyment for a while....

And then as I became a fixture, not a partner, my well of happiness became dry and the busy spouse didn't step forward to refill in a time of drought.  So much time had passed, so much was taken for granted including my own health....

If I had chosen to stay on that darkening path, I would NOT have had a reason to see a physician.  I would have believed myself to be safe in a "monogamous" relationship and free of worries about dangerous viruses. But it turned out I wasn't safe and not knowing the level of danger, I would have ignored my body's warning signs.

The divorce not only lifted me free of emotional and mental constraints, it has now lifted me out of a potentially deadly diagnosis of cervical cancer.  I avoided this scrooge because I became a single woman.  It certainly wasn't something I would have checked before even though my aunt died of this cancer and my first cousins have fought it.  I didn't know I was vulnerable genetically but I should have...I should have NOT counted on being safe just because I was married but I'm on the path to be saved.

The divorce started a chain reaction that has led me to the point of having a life saving surgery.  It will be a simple surgery, an in office procedure with a relatively short recovery time and it's perfect timing.  A delay of even a few months might have set me on the darkest path of all.  But, I will live and cherish this new life I've embarked upon and my ever widening new circle of friends.

Divorce has saved my life.  Now THAT is a silver lining!!  :-)